Embracing Masculinity And Femininity

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them." - Genesis 1:27

There has been so much buzz over the last year about “What is a woman?”

Or “Can you define what it is to be a woman?” Society is seriously conflicted by this topic, and this confusion is transferring to our young (and even older) men and women.

Before I delve into this in more detail, I want to preface everything by saying that I will speak about generalities, averages, and trends. There will be outliers or exceptions that do not disprove the overall trend or tendencies.

Currently, it seems like our generation is so busy trying to prove that women can do everything men can do that women are losing the qualities that set them apart and make them unique.

At the same time, men's important purpose, mission, and value are being erased. Ironically, society is telling women that there is more value to be found by adopting traditionally masculine traits while simultaneously telling men that being masculine is immoral and leads to oppression.

As feminism pushed for more acceptance of women who broke away from the traditional gender roles, it seemed to publicly elevate those who did, thus leading to the false notion that doing so was in some way a more “truer embrace of oneself.”

True femininity is anchored in concern about people, empathy, experience-oriented, and expressing the spiritual from the physical (the most classic example is turning a house into a home).

These are all very positive traits, but as I’ve written about before, leaning too heavily into a virtue can become a vice.

Too much empathy becomes advocacy at the expense of law, too much focus on experiences undermines the foundation of data and reason, etc.

For men, embracing one's masculinity has increasingly become associated with toxicity and embracing the “oppressive patriarchal structure.”

Furthermore, the idea of what masculinity SHOULD look like is also undergoing radical change. Physicality, results-oriented, creating/building, and risk-taking are traits that can be extremely beneficial when balanced.

Masculinity only becomes a problem when it isn't bridled or balanced. But as we mentioned earlier, femininity also runs into issues, albeit different, when it runs unchecked.

Men cannot allow the fear of these outcomes to stop them from pursuing and developing these crucial characteristics; rather, we must emphasize the importance of ALSO developing discipline and charity.

We must stop viewing the differences between masculine and feminine traits as superior or inferior but just different and necessarily, complimentary.

If we look to the Family Proclamation for guidance on how these two characteristics are supposed to interact, it tells us. “In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.”

Genesis says God created Eve as a “help meet” for Adam; the term “help meet” doesn’t mean that Eve was created to be Adam’s servant. Moses and David used the same word to refer to God as their helper. (Exodus 18:4, Psalm 33:20, 70:5)

Surely they didn’t think of Jehovah as a personal servant to be summoned and ordered about at will! God is indisputably superior in those relationships, yet he is still called a helper.

In this context, God is the person who helps them in areas that they are deficient in, who they can lean on for strength, who bridles and refines their strengths, and who helps them reach their full potential.

In looking at it in this context, the parallels between God and a wife who has embraced her femininity as a “help meet” become extremely apparent.

The breakdown of masculinity and femininity goes to the core of each of our identities, to the purpose of marriage, and to the development of the family. At what point do we reach a tipping point where this balance throws our society into a tailspin?

Best,

Greg Matsen